Recognition

I haven’t been a fan of this winter, and indeed am dreading the impending snowstorm. But even in the muted times of winter I thankfully can still find beauty and lessons in nature and my work with horses. I have been watching the horses ability to cope with the harsh elements and the times they seem filled with joy running around the pasture and rolling around in the snow.

As time goes by and my healing progresses I have been able to slow down enough to feel communication with them more. Imagine those moments in your life where you are in a group of people and you catch someone’s eye. There is a great deal of information that goes into initial and ongoing connection. Eye contact is everything. You’ve probably heard of couples or parents who seem to have whole conversations go on without a word. I think those moments of eye contact and connection are part of regulation. Just having the experience of positive or “knowing” eye contact often calms and regulates us.

Then there is the feeling we get about someone who won’t look us in the eye. Even horses do that when their focus is on food or getting out to pasture. I understand they feel urgent about what they want, so I take the time to get them to focus on me before we do anything. It’s safer for both of us and ultimately makes things easier in the long run. I know we’re good when they look me in the eye. I may still feel some impatience from them, but they have settled enough to be present.

The same goes for our relationships with people. I saw a meme today that said it well. It described a “safe” person as someone who allows our emotions and gives us space and support to regulate. I have spent a lot of time in the past ten years talking about brain function and the effects of trauma on the brain. I have been expanding my understanding of our nervous system in relation to the world/relationships/trauma in recent months. While the brain and the nervous system seem like a chicken and egg situation, but I am coming to understand there are primal parts to our nervous system that simply respond. I have been becoming more conscious of where my body is in space (proprioception), how I use my voice, and how I move my body to help calm and regulate those around me. Definitely a life-long journey.

The photo was taken of this year’s Snow Moon. It has been great to hear the spring bird’s arriving and knowing many babies are being born now. I have always been aware of natures’ cycles, but much more now that I spend more time out in it. I hope you all feel awakening, inside and out, as a grace.